Redneck computer terms


Log On: Makin' the wood stove hotter.


Log Off: Don't add no wood.


Monitor: Keepin' an eye on the wood stove.


Download: Gettin' the firewood off the pickup.


Mega Hertz: When yer not careful down loadin'.


Floppy Disk: Whatcha git from pilin' too much firewood.


Ram: The hydrolic thingy that splits the firewood.


Hard Drive: Getting' home in the winter season.


Prompt: What you wish the mail was in the winter.


Windows: What to shut when it's below 15 below.


Screen: What 'cha need for the black fly season.


Byte: That's what the flies do.


Chip: What to munch on.


Micro Chip: What's left in the bottom of the bag.


Infrared: Where the left-overs go when Fred's around.


Modem: What 'cha did to the hay fields.


Dot Matrix: Farmer Matrix's wife.


Lap Top: Where little kids feel comfy.


Keyboard: Where ya hang your keys.


Software: Them plastic eatin' utensils.


Mouse: Whats eats the horses grain.


Main Frame: Hold up the barn roof.


Port: Fancy wine.


Enter: C'mon in.


Random Access Memory: You can't remember whatcha' paid for that new rifle when your wife asks.