You might be a redneck if...


You have an Elvis Jell-o mold.


You have the taxidermist's number on speed-dial.


You own more cowboy boots than sneakers.


You've been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.


You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.


You just bought an 8-track player to put in your car.


There are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.


It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.


You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors.


You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to defend your sister's honor.