You might be a redneck if...


On stag night, you take a real deer.


You use a 55 Chevy as a guest house.


Your back porch is bigger than your house.


There is more oil in your cap than in your car.


You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.


A full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.


An expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.


You think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother's tooth.


You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.


Your secret family recipe is illegal.