You might be a redneck if...


Your Christmas tree is still up in February.


You've ever been arrested for loitering.


You think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors d'ouvre.


There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.


You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.


You've ever shot anyone for looking at you.


You own a homemade fur coat.


Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.


Your momma has "ammo" on her Christmas list.


You've totaled every car you've ever owned.