OLD TEACHERS never die, they just lose their class


OLD TELEPHONES never die, they just stop ringing


OLD THERMODYNAMICISTS never die, they just achieve their state -- of maximum entropy


OLD TIRE TUBES never die, they just get punctured


OLD TRASH never dies, they just bury it


OLD TRIGONOMETRY TEACHERS never die, they just lose their identities


OLD TROMBONISTS never die - they just slide away...


OLD TRUCK DRIVERS never die; they just get a new Peterbilt


OLD TV SHOWS never die, they just get rerun on Nickelodeon


OLD TV SOAP STARS never die, they become pathetic


OLD GOAL UMPIRES never die, they just get flagged down -- umpires as in Australian Rules Football


OLD USENETTERS never die, they just become unresponsive


OLD VACATIONERS never die, they just don't come back


OLD VIOLINISTS never die - they just become unstrung.


OLD VOICEMAIL SYSTEMS never die, they just stop answering