Money short

Times are hard

Heres your fucking

Christmas card



T'was the night before christmas

And all trough the house

Everybody felt shitly

Even the mouse



Dad at the whorehouse

Mom smoking grass

I'll just settle down

For a nice piece of ass



Then out on the lawn

I heard such a chattle

I sprung from my piece

To see what was the matter



Then out on the lawn

I saw a big dick

I knew in a moment

It must be Saint Nick



He came down the chimney

Like a baat from hell

I knew in a moment

That fucker had fell



He filled our stockings

With peanuts and beers

And a big rubber dick

For my brother to queer



As he rosed up the chimney

With a thunderous fart

That son ofa bitch

Blew the chimney apart



As he swored and cursed

Out of sight

Piss on u all

And have a hell of a night