First Law of Bicycling: No matter which way you ride, it's uphill and against the wind.


First Law of Procrastination: Procrastination shortens the job and places the responsibility for its termination on someone else (i.e., the authority who imposed the deadline).


First Law of Socio-Genetics: Celibacy is not hereditary.


First Rule of History: History doesn't repeat itself; historians merely repeat each other.


Flo Capp's Observation: The next best thing to doing something smart is not doing something stupid.


Flon's Law: There is not now, and never will be, a language in which it is the least bit difficult to write bad programs.


Flucard's Corollary: Anything dropped in the bathroom falls in the toilet.